There are some days where as a mother you my think to yourself "Do they even hear me?", "Am I only here to pick up, wipe bums, cook, and drive?" There are days I loose my patience, and others where I have probably lost my tongue. There are days where I just want to curl up or walk away. I know I am not the only one, but at times I can make myself believe that I am the only mother going through these types of days. I start to compare myself to the other moms around me. You know the ones. The one with a spotless house. The one that never raises her voice or looses her mind. The one that has a fresh plate of cookies waiting for her kids when they arrive from school. The one that makes play dresses and forts and acts like a pirate with her kids. The more I think that she exists the more I realize that I am that mom too. I may not be it ALL the time, but I do try to be. We can't be all those things at once. There are days when the house has to be left a mess in order to make cookies with the kids or go out and enjoy a day at the beach looking for a pirate treasure. We are all THAT mom. EVERY mom has her troubles and trials with her children. In fact the older my children get the more I have. I know that there will be lots of ups and downs. But isn't it the downs that make us really appreciate those ups?
Recently a really good friend sent me a video that reminded me of my work as a mother. There are times that I forget that I don't have to do it alone. And by all means I don't with a wonderful husband. However, even when you do have a great companion by your side you need MORE help. That help only can come from the partnership of the Lord. Our work as mothers is a sacred one. One that our Father in Heaven as intrusted us with. One that he promises to help us fullfill if we remember him and allow him to. Thank you April for reminding me this by sending me the video.
It doesn't take long to quickly spiral and think that our work is unappreciated or feel that we are invisible.
Just this morning I was given an email by a woman at church. I don't know how many people she sent it too. I don't know if she just clicked an email list and sent it out in mass form. But I do know that I needed to hear it. I don't know who else needs to hear it, but I do know that there is someone out there who feels the same way I do at times and so I am going to share the email with you. I have also included the video that was given to me by my dear friend.
I don't know how to upload the video onto blogger so just click on the above link and it will take you there.
The Invisible Mother.....
It all began to make sense, the blank stares, the lack of response, theway one of the kids will walk into the room while I'm on the phoneand ask to be taken to the store. Inside I'm thinking, 'Can't you seeI'm on the phone?'
Obviously not; no one can see if I'm on the phone, or cooking, orsweeping the floor, or even standing on my head in the corner, becauseno one can see me at all. I'm invisible.. The invisible Mom. Some days Iam only a pair of hands,nothing more! Can you fix this? Can you tiehis? Can you open this??
Some days I'm not a pair of hands; I'm not even a human being. I'm aclock to ask, 'What time is it?' I'm a satellite guide to answer,'What number is the Disney Channel?' I'm a car to order, 'Right around5:30, please.'
Some days I'm a crystal ball; 'Where's my other sock?, Where's myphone?, What's for dinner?'
I was certain that these were the hands that once held books and theeyes that studied history, music and literature -but now, they haddisappeared into the peanut butter, never to be seen again. She's going,she's going, she's gone!?
One night, a group of us were having dinner, celebrating the return ofa friend from England . She had just gotten back from a fabulous trip,and she was going on and on about the hotel she stayed in. I was sittingthere, looking around at the others all put together so well.
It was hard not to compare and feel sorry for myself. I was feelingpretty pathetic, when she turned to me with a beautifully wrappedpackage, and said, 'I brought you this.' It was a book on the greatcathedrals of Europe.
I wasn't exactly sure why she'd given it to me until I read herinscription: 'With admiration for the greatness of what you are buildingwhen no one sees.'
In the days ahead I would read - no, devour - the book. And I woulddiscover what would become for me, four life-changing truths, afterwhich I could pattern my work: 1) No one can say who built the greatcathedrals - we have no record of their names. 2) These builders gavetheir whole lives for a work they would never see finished. 3) They madegreat sacrifices and expected no credit. 4) The passion of theirbuilding was fueled by their faith that the eyes of God saw everything.
A story of legend in the book told of a rich man who came to visit thecathedral while it was being built, and he saw a workman carving atiny bird on the inside of a beam. He was puzzled and asked the man,'Why are you spending so much time carving that bird into a beam thatwill be covered by the roof, No one will ever see it And the workmanreplied, 'Because God sees.'
I closed the book, feeling the missing piece fall into place. It wasAlmost as if I heard God whispering to me, 'I see you. I see thesacrifices you make every day, even when no one around you does.
No act of kindness you've done, no sequin you've sewn on, no cupcakeyou've baked, no Cub Scout meeting, no last minute errand is too smallfor me to notice and smile over. You are building a great cathedral, butyou can't see right now what it will become.
I keep the right perspective when I see myself as a great builder. Asone of the people who show up at a job that they will never seefinished, to work on something that their name will never be on. Thewriter of the book went so far as to say that no cathedrals couldever be built in our lifetime because there are so few people willing tosacrifice to that degree.
When I really think about it, I don't want my son to tell the friendhe's bringing home from college for Thanksgiving, 'My Mom gets up at 4in the morning and bakes homemade pies, and then she hand bastes aturkey for 3 hours and presses all the linens for the table.' Thatwould mean I'd built a monument to myself. I just want him to want tocome home. And then, if there is anything more to say to his friend,he'd say, 'You're gonna love it there...'
As mothers, we are building great cathedrals. We cannot be seen ifwe're doing it right. And one day, it is very possible that the worldwill marvel, not only at what we have built, but at the beauty that hasbeen added to the world by the sacrifices of invisible mothers.
The Will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.To all the wonderful mothers out there!!
May God give you...For every storm, a rainbow,
For every tear, a smile,For every care, a promise,
And a blessing in each trial.
For every problem life sends,A faithful friend to share,
For every sigh, a sweet song,
And an answer for each prayer.
I do know that my work is worth it as a mother. I can see that it is when I see the joy in my children's eyes. I feel it in thier hugs and their their tender kisses. There is no other calling in this world that can replace that of being a mother. I know that at times it is hard. I know that at times it is lonely. But those times of trials are what remind me to get on my knees and ask for help. Those times I feel closest to my Savior and my Father in Heaven.
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